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Vaguely Ill But I Don't Have to Kill Anyone, So I Guess I'm Doing Great!

Today I am still feeling vaguely ill.
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Also, I finally rented and watched the Hunger Games movie. I wasn't thrilled with any of the previews I saw, so I didn't expect much out of the movie.

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So, while the movie certainly didn't beat the book at all (even the visual effects like the fire-clothes were better in the book!), I did enjoy it and I'll probably rent the rest of the movies when they come out. =)

ETA: Suddenly, I'm extremely nauseous. Gonna take some Dramamine, hope it helps... though I'll probably just end up falling asleep since it makes me drowsy. Arg. Stupid body.

ETA2: Nausea gone. Drowsiness and headache have taken it's place. Arg. Gonna try to write for another hour, then I'm giving up and going to bed.
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Quick poll tonight. I feel like shit. I've been having dizzy/nausea spells on and off for about 3 months now. They only hang around for 2-3 days a month, but they suck. All I want to do is sleep... but I'm still working on The Bet. I really, really want to finish soon.

While dizzy, non-writing tasks are easier, so I started playing around with my book cover for The Bet. Check out the two versions below, then please take the poll! And I mean everyone! Even if you've never written a word to me, please, please, please fill out the poll. This is market research people, and I need to know what everyone in the market likes. =P

Poll #1864559 Covers?

I like the dimensions (length x width) better for...


I like the fonts better on...


I like the color of the image better for...


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Now I know why they cost so much...

Whenever I see someone advertising that they will format your ebook for you and post it on all the appropriate web venues, I always wonder why anyone would be willing to pay $100 or more for something they can easily do themselves. Then I format one of my own books for the various sites and remember how much of a pain in the ass it is.

Especially when you spend 3 hours editing and formatting and making everything pretty... only to realize you've used the wrong draft of your story. *facepalm*

So, after yet another hour of editing and formatting, I can now announce that COMMUNICATION is complete. Done. Finished. Alleluia.

If you'd like, it's available for download as an epub, mobi, or pdf file on my website and on Smashwords. You can also read it entirely online at my website.

Currently it is "publishing" on When it does finish publishing, it will be $0.99 at first, though I'll do my best to get it free on there too. It'll also take a few days for it to get shipped from Smashwords to iBooks and Barnes and Noble. I'll keep an eye on those sites and let you know when it goes up on there. =)

And now it's back to work on The Bet...
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New Laptop! ♥

Well, I'm typing this on my new laptop. It's a Lenovo G570, and my old one was a Lenovo G550, so it handles much like my old one did. The tech specs are mostly the same, but this one has a different keyboard set up and a built-in card reader. I'm liking the card reader, but I'm not sure I'm going to like the keyboard. They moved all my favorite buttons!

Anyway, the files and programs I use are all set and ready, so I'm back on track with everything... minus $300. Sigh.

Oh well. It's time for me to get back to work on THE BET. Once I get that published I'll be rolling in the dough, right? =P
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Stupid laptops and their stupidness!

My laptop is dead. It still works, but the battery only lasts 15 minutes and the screen will not stay open unless you prop it just right. So, for all intents and purposes, it's dead. Due to a bad back, I use it primarily in bed while laying down and if I have to be in a specific position, well, that won't work.

I ran over to Office Depot this morning to get a new laptop because of this. I found a great one, normally $650, on sale for $450 + $100 mail in rebate for a final price of $350. Well, I thought the price was too good to be true, and guess what? It was. I brought it home, got it all pretty and loaded with my personal files, and then tried to load Microsoft Office... only to discover that the CD/DVD drive doesn't work.

After two hours of fiddling on my own and 1 hour fiddling with a support guy's help, I gave up. The thing is crap. I'm taking it back to the store tomorrow, where I'm going to have to fight to get my money back, since they only give "exchanges" on computers once they have been opened. Uh, no. I'm not exchanging one piece of crap for another. I like the brand, and I will buy their cheap version this time, as it's the same as my current computer, only the next version of the model. I love my computer and it's lasted me 2 years, which is my criteria for a good laptop.

So, I want that model, and I want the price difference back on my credit card... not as store credit. I'm afraid that getting that is going to be a battle though...
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Ew, Grammar!

So, today I finished revisions on COMMUNICATION. Yay! I'm sending it off to someone now for proofreading, and then it will be ready for release on the internet as an ebook. No worries though, it'll be free. =D

However, as I was looking into formatting it for ebook, I decided to read over THE BROKEN, just to kind of get a feel for how I formatted that ebook. Instead of noticing the formatting, however, I soon found myself realizing that it has some grammar issues. It's certainly not horrible, but there are some sentences that could really be cleaned up.

This is a good thing, I suppose, because it means that I've grown as a writer over the past year. The fact that I can now recognize that some of my writing was a bit clumsy is fabulous! However, the fact that I released such clumsy writing is embarrassing. Once I finish THE BET and release it, I think I'll go back and edit THE BROKEN. I won't be changing any of the story, as I feel that once a story has been released, it's done and shouldn't be changed, but I will go through and clean up my grammar and double check for typos and such. =)

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Why Do I Like Gay Guys?

So, I'm feeling a little more upbeat today. I'm also feeling think-y. And thus I have found myself thinking about romance, relationships, and the fact that I tend to crush on gay guys.

Yes. I am a very strange person, why do you ask?

Anyway, what started me off on thinking about this was that I had an interview for a job yesterday. (Yes, ANOTHER one. Ugh.) The minute I met the interviewer, my gaydar went off. Two seconds after that, I found myself thinking, "You know, he's kind of cute!"

Don't ask me why, but half of my crushes have been on gay guys. The first one was the cute family friend who came out to us by inviting us over to his new apartment, which he shared with his "roommate". Of course, once we were given a tour of the apartment, it quickly became obvious that they were roommates... and bedmates. In a three bedroom apartment, two bedrooms had been converted into offices and the third contained only one bed.

I was about 15 at the time, and my girlish dreams that the cute family friend would one day notice I was becoming a woman were shattered.

Not two years later, I fell hard for a guy in one of my classes. He was funny, tall, and from Italy. The tall part was especially important... at 5 foot 8 inches tall, I rarely meet guys who are noticably taller than me. I was smitten, especially after I got to kiss him during a game of Spin the Bottle. I just knew he'd ask me to prom!

Not two weeks later, he came out to the entire school as bisexual. Two weeks after that, he announced he was simply gay.

Girlish dreams? Shattered again.

Why do I do this to myself? I don't know, but I really wish I did!
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So, I'm STILL working on THE BET. This book has been a long-slog for me, mostly because I keep editing the plot! Not the overall plot, just the way I want the last half of the book to go. Unfortunately, events shape characters, and every time I change an event to make my plot flow better, I end up learning more about my characters and their motivations. Then I end up rewriting things earlier in the story to make them fit!

ARG. Editing is important, I know, but it drives me crazy. And I have a lot of trouble letting mistakes stay in my story once I realize they are mistakes. So I can't seem to put the editing aside long enough to completely finish the first draft... though is it really a first draft considering Chapter One has been edited about 10 times?

That's what tends to happen to me with more original fic though. I worry so much more about doing a good job on it that I get writer's block or I fiddle with the same sentence for an hour to make it perfect or I rewrite entire sections just because I didn't like the dialogue in the last version. With fanfic, I guess I feel like the bar is set so much lower that if I make a few mistakes, people will forgive me as long as I've written a good story, which lets me churn out the words without upsetting my internal editor.

It also helps that I rarely change anything in a chapter once I've posted it! Posting seems to stop the editing monster dead in its tracks. =P
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RL is OK.

So, real life update: I've got two different schools interested in hiring me for part-time positions. While I would much prefer a full-time position, this will be a foot in the door! However, neither position has been finalized yet, so I have to wait to hear from the district about whether I'm going to be hired.

Ugh. Bureaucracy in the school system sucks.

Even if both positions do fall through, I've been hired by an online tutoring company, so that's something at least!

And as for my current cashier position, my last official day is tomorrow! While I'll miss the people, I WON'T miss the job. =P

Things are finally falling into place!

(My stress levels and thus my anxiety are still through the roof though, lol. It'll take a few weeks of settling into the new job before I'm able to relax again...)